Monthly Archives: March 2010

Another childhood favourite ruined…

…BUT IN A GOOD WAY!

Alien Vs Pooh

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Snap, crackle, pop!

A branch sitting on some power lines.

You don’t need to know anything else. Except… turn up your sound!

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Something to get your head around…

A while back, I posted a link to this YouTube video of what purported to be ‘The World’s Greatest Head Massage’:

This month, the clip hit over one million views. I’m oddly proud of it: I was there almost from the start, when it only had a few thousand, after finding it one night while surfing for head massage videos. It blew me away. It’s so funny (“Note the application of cosmic energy” still cracks me up), the song in the background is catchy (I’ve even downloaded it off iTunes) and – most importantly – it’s astonishingly relaxing. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve watched it at the end of a long day when I need to de-stress; it’s like I’m having a real massage through my computer screen.

Well, to my surprise, it turns out that I’m not the only one who loves it. In addition to those one million views, the song blaring over the radio has been downloaded by countless other souls and this has become THE video to watch if you need to relax. The masseur, Baba, has actually become a cult figure.

It’s been so popular that the nice man who filmed it recorded this a few weeks ago to discuss its background. It seems he’s as amazed by its success as I am…

BUT! That’s not all…

This week I discovered another video, posted by a lady who’d travelled to India to get her own massage after watching the original. It took her a while to track down the correct barber shop in Pushkar, and even longer to find Baba, but here he is in all his cosmic glory… only this time he’s playing to the camera!

Watch. Enjoy. Relax. And wish that Baba would go on a world tour so that we, too, could note the application of cosmic energy to our own heads.

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Darwinism in action

I hate high heels. I can’t walk in the buggers. I think there are very few women who actually can walk in the buggers; most women kid themselves that they can when actually they can’t.

They give some women beautifully elongated legs and look fantastically sexy, but those kind of women usually have beautifully elongated legs and look fantastically sexy anyway. The majority of women who wear heels have to adjust their bodies to compensate for their unnatural gait and this makes them look faintly ridiculous. I’ve seen many women wearing impressive heels who are in so much danger of overbalancing that they walk with their groins thrust forward so that it enters a room two minutes before they do. (My friend Biddy and I used to call these women ‘fanny-firsts’ many years ago, in the days when ‘fanny’ still meant ‘front bottom’ and not the Americanised version of the word.)

Bearing all of this in mind, the fact that I saw a woman teetering precariously along a railway platform yesterday in four-inch heels that she absolutely couldn’t walk in comes as no surprise; she was all twitchy knees and ankles, like Bambi trying to walk on ice, and the scraping of her heels on the floor as she tried to pick her feet up made my teeth go on edge.

No, none of that surprised me. What surprised me was that she was carrying a baby.

Quite how any new mother could think that carrying a very vulnerable child in her arms while not being able to walk was a good idea is beyond me. I can only assume that she was the stupidest woman on the planet. And while I desperately hope that she doesn’t ever trip on her heels, fall over and flatten her baby into a pancake on the floor, I also sort of hope that she does, because people like that shouldn’t be allowed to spread their stupid genes into the human race.

Darwin demands that this woman and her offspring be removed from our species! And, with those heels, it’s just a matter of time…

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