On Twitter, Fish-Keeping And Not Fancying Chris Pine

I have much to say, so I thought bullet points would be a nice idea for a change. They make my comments look much more… well, professional. Like slipping an essay into a plastic binder, or using a staple instead of a paper clip. Maybe you agree. Maybe you don’t. Whatever you think, here they come…

  • Buy this month’s Total Film. Go on. It’s a great issue, and it just so happens to contain a big feature about The Lord of the Rings which was written by yours truly.
  • What? I’m not allowed to self-pimp on my own blog?
  • I’ve started keeping tropical fish. They are surprisingly intelligent and seem to know who I am, and they also get very excited when they see me because they think I’m going to feed them, which makes me feel as though we have some kind of bond. Okay, so they’re not quite as cute as kittens, but they’ll do.
  • I started watching The Mentalist. I really don’t like the lead guy (Patrick Jane) but the show’s not bad.
  • I also started watching Castle. I really like the lead guy (Richard Castle) but the show’s pretty poor.
  • The Mentalist and Castle are essentially EXACTLY THE SAME SHOW WITH DIFFERENT CASTS. It’s creepy.
  • I hate Twitter. It’s clunky, pig-ugly, counter-intuitive (seriously, can anybody use it without having to ask a friend what to do?) and it spams you with porn.
  • I appear to be addicted to it. Twitter, that is, not the porn.
  • I blame http://twitter.com/qikipedia, the Tweets from the Elves who put together all the information for the BBC show QI; they’re fascinating. And I also blame http://twitter.com/TW1TTERTRACKER, run by The Tonight Show, which re-Tweets banal messages from celebrities and pokes fun at how “exciting” they are. And I mostly blame http://twitter.com/mishacollins, who has taken Twitter to an entire new level by whipping up an alternate reality in which he’s either imprisoned in Guantanamo Bay, being held for treason by Her Majesty the Queen or crawling through the desert to bring down the corrupt government of Iran. The fact that he’s posting pictures of himself and his friends living out these fantasies makes his Tweets all the more amazing.
  • I went to Oxford the first time the other day and visited the Museum of Natural History. They had a kakapo! And the building was glorious and sort of steampunkish and also quite similar to London’s Natural History Museum in its architecture, which is a good thing, because London’s Natural History Museum is my favourite building in the whole world. It absolutely rocked!



Also, Oxford is beautiful:


  • I seem to have been the only person in the world who liked Terminator Salvation. Oh well, it’s not like I’m a film critic who needs people to respect and trust my opinion or anything.
  • Wait, hang on…
  • For the record: in this month’s SFX, the contents page suggests that I “love Chris Pine”. I would like to say that I love him as Kirk. I do not love him in any other way. I know this sounds silly, but I have so many celebrity crushes that being accused of having a crush on a celebrity I don’t actually have a crush on seems insulting.  In fact, I’d like to state for the record that I don’t have a crush on anybody in the new Star Trek movie at all, okay? Not even Karl Urban. (Although I will admit to having had a crush on him in the past. So he sort of counts, I suppose.)
  • I do, however, have a crush on Rafael Nadal, and now he’s pulled out of Wimbledon I am major-league sulking, because I was actually going to watch it this year. Dammit.

And I think that’s about it for the bullet points for today.



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11 responses to “On Twitter, Fish-Keeping And Not Fancying Chris Pine

  1. Looking forward to Total Film, as always. I read it every month, and with pleasure.(though I don’t actually buy it)!

    By the way, is it me, or has SFX really upped the nostalgia this past year?
    I am not minding though. How about The Greatest American Hero?

    Hope to take Jasmijn to London’s Natural History Museum one day, since she is really into dinosaurs at the moment (and knights!). We watch Nigel Marvin’s Prehistoric Park together, and she just loves it…

    Crush on an athlete? Katarina Witt, no doubt about it….

  2. lizwc

    hmmm I have a crush on Captain Becker in Primeval but not a crush on Ben Mansfield his actor… (it’s not just the looks, it’s the tacking on huge super-powered predatory animals and winning) so I guess I get where you’re coming from.
    On an almost related note, I’m gutted they’ve killed off Primeval… This seems to be the year science fiction telly dies…

  3. lizwc

    ….sp. Taking on super-powered predatory animals… must check comments before posting them.

  4. Lerxst

    Tropical fish? Hmm. Does this mean you’re not going to start fostering cats again Jayne? Or just that you’re getting the special treats in ready? 🙂

    You’re right about Oxford though. I was lucky enough to spend 3 years studying there (well, playing pool mainly), and I’d like to think I never took it for granted. The architecture is just stunning (especially Keble College, but I’m biased), and just oozes history. The only major downside would be the coachloads of French schoolchildren, which Oxford is even less designed to cope with than London…..

    Athlete, Ruud? Steffi….definitely Steffi…..

  5. I forgot to mention that I did like terminator: Salvation. I really disliked McG’s Charlies Angels films, so maybe I had really low expectations. There were moments of course where I was thinkin “Eh?”, and “oi, wait a minute!”, but in general, yeah I liked.
    It will be added to the collection once it is out on DVD.
    (I even liked it more than Star Trek, but maybe this had to do with expectations as well…)

    Oh, and Lerxst, which Steffi? Nerius, Martin, or the other one, with the tennisracket?

  6. Lerxst

    Haven’t seen Terminator yet, but finally saw Star Trek the other day and enjoyed it far more than I expected – I was even happy to suspend disbelief at Kirk’s preposterous career leap. Indeed, the only bit that jarred was the initial scenes with Simon Pegg; it wasn’t his portrayal of Scotty that grated – I hadn’t expected him to be anything like the original – but the script which suddenly seemed to veer off into another film (the sort of slapstick farce where Leslie Nielsen would suddenly walk on). Otherwise, though, it was excellent.

    Fraulein Forehand, Ruud.

  7. Jenni Carberry

    Don’t worry, Jayne, I have a big enough crush on Karl Urban for both of us!! Plus I too am devastated at Primeval going although I fancy Danny! I haven’t seen Terminator Salvation yet but am sure I’ll love it 🙂

  8. jaynenelson


  9. Lerxst

    Aww shucks. I thought you’d like 🙂

  10. I like your idea of a bullet-point post, I might just try it on my blog one of these days.

    I so totally get your crushing over the new Captain Kirk. That said, I’m actually looking forward to Mr. Pine’s other movies, if he can impressively pull off other characters as he did with Kirk.

    Ciao! *continuing my lurking over your other posts*

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